Agony, Colorado be thy name.

Rockies. What the hell has happened to my Rockies? They win 20 of 27, then lose 6 games in a row to 2ND RATE competition. I know one would argue that that makes them worse than the competition. My take is that they are an extremely sympathetic bunch, choosing to placate their opponents, and long-suffering fan bases (1908 and Joe Carter), by spotting them early 6-7 run leads, then losing in spectacular fashion (being 1 hit or scoring 6 runs in the 9th inning, only to lose on a blown save by a "shut down" closer). It's a hard knock life..for us, oh Rockies fans. It's times like these I'm glad I'm a mets fan too. Say what you will about sports bigamy, but it comes in handy in these situations. So until the rox go on another fantastic roll, all hail Mr. Met.

Back in the game...

And i'm back. Blogging from work once again. It's a big company whose name indicates it stays faithful. So this is it, no more school, becoming an old man right before my own eyes. However, i'm not there yet...I just overheard three middle-aged coworkers talking about their kids and youth soccer. Yeah, I'm definitely not old yet. No kids that I know of, not much responsibility here yet, and I can still go out for a drink without asking permission. None of this really has any point other than I'm breaking back into the blogging game. You have been warned.

In other news, I watched my Colorado Rockies destroy the sox 7-1 at Fenway last night. I was so happy I was retaaaaaaaaaaahded.

And to end the post on a bad joke: What's the worst part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

Don't ask don't tell...

Funny story from my Real Estate class:

Each week we have a speaker from various areas of real estate development. The professor is a haggard old real estate developer who loves himself and rips on students all the time. Today, the professor made it a point to tell the students to put our nametags in front of us for when the speaker comes in. Then he calls out this guy Tom, a gruff ex-marine, for having an illegible nametag and says "I can't even read your nametag. What does it say? Fruitcake?"

I guess you had to be here. Uber funny. Ok, back to class.

Why Gary Barnett was REALLY fired.

About a year and a half late, but this is the truth behind the dismissal of the old ball coach.



This is the stuff you see in intramural ball. This is Division I football!!

And I'm back...

Hello, Readers (all 2 of you)...
Back from a brief hiatus. Since I last wrote, the NCAA tournament introduced me to the intimate details of the foreboding omen John Goodman describes to Larry Sellers in the big Lebowski. By picking the COLOSALLY STUPID Wisconsin Badgers run to the title game, I effectively eliminated myself from competition in the first weekend of the tourney. I guess it wasn't meant to be for the good guys this year. With Duke's loss, the only thing I have had to look forward to is the fantastically awesome Roy Hibbert hairdo. I know it doesn't look like much, but this man is sporting a cool afro, and I for one am pleased to watch it march to the title. Also, I've adopted the Hoyas this tourney, as I knew duke would blow goats this year. Additionally, I know it was beaten to death already, and I HATE Tyler Hansbrough with the fire of a thousand suns, but the Henderson "rebond" attempt was totally intentional. I don't advocate the cheapshot, but Hansbrough found out what it's like to be owned by the dukies.

Anyway, on to other news. Looking for jobs in NYC. So far nothing, but I'll be there cheering on the Mets as of June. Since I believe all two of my readers live in NYC anyway, I guess this is me saying I can't wait to get down there.

I hope Florida and Ohio State lose, but i'm preparing for the exact opposite result.
Ok, done for now. See you soon...

Ann Coulter, inspiration to all conservawhores

I will not take my blog in the direction of political commentary. I don't have nearly enough expertise, and said direction violates the humorous spirit of the blog anyway.

But in case you missed it, Ann Coulter, everybody's favorite conservawhore and bigot recently challenged the sexual preferences of democratic presidential candidate John Edwards in a speech to her typically brilliant conservative fan base. Because this is not a political blog, I will not express my views (overtly). However, this wonderful display reminds me of my favorite Ann Coulter-related writing from a couple years back. Check it out, you might enjoy.

All in all, I think Bachem Macuno is an all right dude, he done good with this writing.
-Warning: links are not intended for those sensitive to offensive slurs or anal sex-

Recockulousnous

Nothing reminds me more of my pathetic Jewish athletic ceiling than this clip. I'm sure this guy is also hung like a fucking donkey, but at least I'll have my mba by the time i'm 26! Take that, Adrian Wilson...Yeah, that doesn't make me feel any better...